Adolf Hitler is my hero. I'm glad that Rabbi Schneerson turned me on to all the good that he did and all the diseases he cured.

What's possessing the Funniest Joke Since the Cambrian Explosion worth if you can't take it out from under its glass and show it off at dinner parties now and again?

My rage is so multi-faceted,

that each distinct side of my anger acts in concert, like the panels of some desert solar collector, to focus each sliver of my ire into one locus of all-consuming, seething, surface-of-the-sun, runaway nuclear fusion meltdown.

I don't comprehend how the human soul can withstand this much pure rage without being destroyed by it. How does the human organism even function while bathed in the glow of this much anger?

I know that I have the tendency to lash out and say hurtful things. This is because I have very little emotional control. So I will attempt to describe for you my anger, rather than act it out.

I am angry about the following things, in no particular order:

• I am angry that no one will speak to me. I suspect that I am on various terra lists, whereby no one may warn me that I am being investigated. We've got lots of secret laws now, where some claim the authority to demand that one not warn another that he is under investigation. I don't care. I don't take instruction from criminals. If one of them were to interview me about some suspect person and then demand that I not warn that person that he is being investigated, MY IMMEDIATE RESPONSE, BORN OF SOME SENSE OF PURE DEFIANCE, WOULD BE TO GET ON THE PHONE AND WARN HIM THAT HE IS BEING INVESTIGATED. It's how you treat the demands of criminals: you ignore them. The moral cowardice in this land is astounding.
• I am angry that fellow comedians steal from me. Not material, but approaches or aesthetics. How I approach something, how I engage a topic. It's not exactly theft, but other comedians derive value from watching me. They then apply to their own work what they've seen me do. This has been going on for several years. I make it safe to cover material. I cut a trail through the underbrush and get all scratched up. Everyone else comes in behind me. Do you think I'd get something so simple as a sip from their canteens? Nope. Nothing.
• I am not working in television for one simple reason: I have indicted the Beautiful People for their role in 9-11 and for their singularly disgusting, supremacist, chauvinistic beliefs that caused them to undertake that tactical error. Now Hymie Finkleman, TV executive, quite understandably, can't bear the thought of seeing my ugly face wandering around the halls of the office building, lest he be reminded of how his people ruined a perfectly functioning system of lawful government, completely oblivious to the dangers of authoritarian social systems, a sensitivity he would be expected to possess, what with the boxcars and ovens thing. Chris is the Nazi here, but, uh, he's the only one here who seems to despise Nazis.
  
• Barring working in television --which will never occur; Jews are a very petty, unforgiving people-- I am angry that I am being denied my tailor-made revenue model: No one will buy their ticket.
• I am angry that I am covering everyone's material for them. Jon Stewart, for example, ideally would be the comedian covering the material of how his people flew planes into the World Trade Center. Keith Olbermann, Newsman Extraordinaire, Mister Good Night and Good Luck himself, as if he were a journalist or something, ideally would be covering the material about how his producer's people flew planes into the World Trade Center. The New York Times, Printer of All the News that Fits Israel's Propaganda Model, should be playing Fourth Estate for once and explaining to the country how Israeli intelligence came to play such an instrumental role in 9-11.
• I am angry that, like the shark, the comedian must always move forward or he's dead. In five years of covering everyone material for them, of performing everyone's job for them, I have moved so far away from my original, simple goal of telling some fart jokes and finding love. Now I can't even date because I can't know if I'll turn up in some gulag somewhere. Who wants to get involved with someone who could be dead tomorrow? All gone, all is lost. SIX. FUCKIN'. YEARS. No closer; only farther. Covering everyone else's material has cost me every last thing and gotten me nothing. ALL COMPLETELY LOST. NOTHING WITHIN GRASP ANYMORE. GONE. EVERYTHING. GONE.
• Everyone gets to move on and have cocktail parties and careers and romantic weekend getaways while Chris gets to rattle around the house with a .45 on his belt wondering what that noise is. "Wouldn't you know it: Turns out that during the Bush Administration, all the pieces were in place for a dictatorship and they had domestic death squads and everything." Really? You're finally fuckin' figuring this out? Welcome to reality, dumbass. So while everyone got to have hookups and their romantic weekend getaways in complete blissful ignorance of reality, Chris got to try to conduct his life in such a manner as not to get killed. (And if you can sleep at night, then --almost by definition-- you have no understanding of what is happening in this country.)
• I am angry that I traveled to New York, bearing gifts, and not a single person could meet me at the train station. I gave the gifts to some homeless guy because I certainly was not going to cart them back to Vermont. I will never again set foot in New York.
• I am angry that I have given EVERY LAST THING I POSSESSED in service to others, and I have gotten nothing in return. NOT EVEN A KIND WORD. A single kind word would have made it all okay.

I short, I am angered that so many extract from me the things that they think they can use for themselves, and leave me with nothing but the castoffs. And that is what I am left with: the stuff that no one else wants.

I seethe with rage because I have spent so much of my time and energy and money over the past six years, and gotten nothing in return. But it's not like I was a failure; I was quite successful; I built my audience.

But they won't FUCKIN' buy their FUCKIN' tickets.

That's the failure.

ALL FUCKIN GONE. ALL FUCKIN LOST.

"Mommy, why did Mister King stop telling jokes?"

"Sweetheart, he just ran out of them, that's all. He could no longer tread water in the sea of misery in which he had chosen to work. He came to violate his Prime Directive; he came to harm those he loved the most: his own audience. He fizz-led and-popped; he ratt-led and-knocked... He turned down the lights, went into the cellar, and powered down --to wait for the man who fixes things, 'chawt-thah... chawt-thah...' "

Fin.

More on that MIAC report.

Earlier this month, Missouri governor Jay Nixon went public with his support of the report. On March March 26, Nixon did an abrupt turn-around and distanced himself from the report. “I was not governor when the MIAC was formed,” Nixon said. “I was not governor, I did not hire any of the people there and nobody in my administration — the director of public safety — saw this stuff before it went out,” reports Prime Buzz. “Under a previous system, MIAC would prepare and distribute these reports to law enforcement agencies without review or approval from the colonel of the Highway Patrol or the director of Public Safety,” Nixon said. “That’s simply not acceptable.”

http://www.prisonplanet.com/missouri-state-police-orders-halt-to-miac-report-distribution.html

I am willing to bet that most of that MIAC report came from the Southern Poverty Law Center and the Anti-Defamation League. I will not provide proof here as it is not my job to spoon-feed my audience, but I will tell you that the ADL is the American branch of Israeli intelligence. The ADL has several functions, including spying on Americans and running psyops. Everything out of the ADL is a lie. You need to know that. The ADL, SPLC, and the Simon Wiesenthal Center are disinformation departments within the Hive Mind. You will recall that Mark Weitzman of the SWC equated Arthitects and Engineers for 9/11 Truth with Muslim jihadists during some presentation to a Congressional committee or whatever.

One of the unfortunate post-9/11 realities with which we must reconcile ourselves is that where you find Jews congregating, you will find criminal activity. Jews are thieves and liars. It's in their religion. They regard the property of a gentile to be their own. They regard gentiles as subhuman. (Are you a Jew but you don't hold these beliefs? Then you're not much of a Jew, are you? Why not dissociate yourself from those disgusting beliefs and just convert? The decent peoples of the world would be happy to have you. We, after all, do not believe in frying the Lesser Brethren in some pagan sacrifice to Moloch.)

You need to understand that the steering commitee within the Hive Mind are religiously sworn to destroy all gentile nations and, in particular, Christian nations. They involve themselves in banking for the purpose of gaining control over governments, and they are in complete control of the United States government. They ran the country into the ground and drained its treasury dry. It's what they do. Jews defile things.

A Jew's word means nothing. He operates from a substandard moral code contained within a barbaric, pagan religion. This moral code permits lying to, and stealing from, gentiles.

Judaism is filth, plain and simple. We know that now. 9-11 was the entrypoint into a complete examination of the Jewish Nation. Ew.

9-11 set Jews back fifteen hundred years. Jews are garbage.

And that's everyone else's fault, right?

Don't forget to keep an eye on United Sovereigns of America.

It is my panarchic political union. It is what happens when lawlessness reigns. Reasonable men erect their own political structures for the purpose of defending their persons and property.

You will find my USov communications here: http://unitedsov.blogspot.com/

Things are different now. No federal or state law touches me, except for that which may be incorporated by USov into the PPU Interoperations Framework.

In the absence of any better legal analog, USov's relationship with other jurisdictions will adhere to the Law of Nations.

Any attempt at unlawful enlargement of jurisdiction will be regarded as an act of war. This will be fleshed out in greater detail in the PPU Interoperations Framework. But the quick translation of this is that all necessary force --up to and including lethal force-- will be used to repulse any action of any other jurisdiction that does not comport with the PPU Interoperations Framework. I will remind you that no other jurisdiction any longer possesses the moral claim to rule.

In short --and print this out and tape it somewhere you can see it-- any agent of any jurisdiction who attempts to execute anything other than a USov-approved arrest warrant against a USov member automatically dies. Any agent whose hand even brushes a pair of handcuffs on his belt will be immediately neutralized.

Power understands only one thing.

Yesterday is gone. This is what happens when no one follows the law: Decent men devise their own --and they defend it.

This is not playtime.

I wish no one any harm. I only intend to grow my jurisdiction and offer its blessings to those who wish to defend their property from the plunderings of criminals.

In my absence,

you may rely on the following news sites to keep you abreast of reality:

Lew Rockwell
Prison Planet
Anti War

You read those three each day and you will be the most informed person in the room.

I also suggest Jeff Rense. Bless his heart, but his site is a little on the kookie side. (Advertisements for psychic pills, stories about UFO's, etc. For all I know, those things could be true; they're not my field of expertise. But psychic pills and UFO's are not central to what I am covering. Don't let them prejudice anything else on the site. I read Rense for the over-the-horizon, Distant Early Warning radar stuff. Things I read there may not develop meaning for several weeks or months until the rest of reality "catches up." The Hive Mind cannot stand him. I don't think he's a big fan of Zionist barbarians.

You will be in good hands with these four sites.

By my calculations, I have not smoked or had a drink in a week. It's done. The spell is broken. I feel good, I sleep my five hours and awake refreshed, I go for a walk in the morning, and I'm no longer stressed out all the time. I have my plans for my chicken coop and I've got my garden ready to go.

I get pissy sometimes, I know that. I lash out when I think that I am not getting my due. If ever I was overbroad in my lashings, I apologize.

I am taking a different path now. I will not read newspapers, I will not watch television, and I will not use the internet. If you have a show or a column, I apologize: I will not see it ever again.

Please be well. And remember: Each of you, without exception, is a beautiful being of light. Conduct yourselves accordingly.

Just a reminder.

Get what you want from any blogspot or typepad blogs. I will probably delete those soon.

I will post occasionally on USov matters at http://unitedsov.blogspot.com/

I did some thinking today at work. Stand-up is not compatible with things going on in my life right now. It's been fun, but in my opinion it's gone on for five years too long.

For any hardcore fans, keep an eye on my ckpi twitter feed. If I have any news (which I probably will not) I will post it there.

I am going dormant. I will reactivate if anyone expresses any interest. Otherwise we'll just call it a fun but boring experiment.

I am still awaiting a call from my agent.

...whoever that may be, assuming that there are any in my audience with balls enough for the job.

This is what stand-up is, folks. I'm sorry that it took a non-comedian to show us all how it's done.

Is it my fault that we've gotten away with selling picture of comedy for so long?

If there are no comedians in the house able to withstand the rigors of representing stand-up, then give the job to a newsman. I'm far more closely related to journalists than I am to comedians anyway.

This is why I hate doing this material.

Now I have to see one of my favorite commentators on TV --who is Jewish-- and I know that he will read my material --assuming that he is in my mathematically derived audience, which he would be-- and it will make him feel bad to read what I had to say.

I do not like this job, and I would beg everyone's understanding as I try to figure out how to do it. I don't like to make people feel bad as they speak, knowing that I am looking at them through that TV camera.

This is all extremely fascinating, but, alas, ultimately irrelevant.

FBI Director Robert S. Mueller III today urged lawmakers to move swiftly to renew intelligence-gathering measures set to expire in December, calling them "exceptional" tools to help protect national security.

Mueller told members of the Senate Judiciary Committee that he hoped that the reauthorization of two provisions contained in the Patriot Act would be far less "controversial" than in previous years. During the Bush administration, the law drove a wedge between investigators seeking to detect terrorist threats and advocates warning that it trampled on Americans' civil liberties.

In response to a question from Sen. Ben Cardin (D-Md.), Mueller said that his agents had used a provision that helped authorities secure access to business records about 220 times between 2004 and 2007. Data for last year was not yet available, Mueller said.

The measure, known as section 215 after its location in the Patriot Act, has been criticized by the American Civil Liberties Union as allegedly violating the First Amendment rights of U.S. citizens. It allows investigators probing terrorism to seek a suspect's records from third parties such as financial services, travel and telephone companies without notifying the suspect.

"It has been exceptionally helpful in our national security investigations," the FBI director said.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/03/25/AR2009032501862_pf.html

I know it takes "respectable" types some number of years to catch up to the "kooks" of the world --in embracing, for example, the weirdo ideas that invisible creatures called "microbes" under the dirty fingernails of surgeons cause disease; that defecating into the town water supply is not a good idea; and that buildings don't just blow up and fall down like that-- but there is great power in wielding the truth.

The truth has magical powers. It just lets you cut a swath through entire arguments. It's a trump card:

"I see that you want the Patriot Act renewed. I don't see how it will protect me from the compartmentalized elements of the CIA, Mossad, and the Pentagon who flew planes into the World Trade Center. What say ye? Nothing? Alright, then; let's break for lunch."

Ninety-five percent of the blather I see on TV and in the newspapers has ZERO MEANING WHATSOEVER when it is regarded in light of THE FACT THAT 9-11 was executed by bankers, not brown people. "Yes, we've been talking for the past eight years as if we had fingered the right guy. Turns out that we had the wrong guy and the policies are completely backwards, but we'll just continue playing the same old tune."

And the newspaper people moan about their job security. Well, it is as if FULLY NINETY-FIVE PERCENT of the paper were just white space; it's all cockamamie talk predicated upon a BS story that CANNOT POSSIBLY BE TRUE AS IT DOES NOT COMPORT WITH THE LAWS OF PHYSICS.

The mantra you need to remember is this:

BANKERS, NOT BROWN PEOPLE.

Your every woe stems from the actions of bankers. Brown people are not even on your radar.

And you people need to fix this issue fast. This police state that has been constructed around you was constructed for the purpose of killing you when you find out who destroyed your country. "No, Chris, you're so silly; if it turns out that you're right, we'll just vote them out. We have plenty of time."

No you don't. You don't vote occupation forces out of office. It doesn't work that way.

This is one of those things that magically disappears with a proper application of "Semite-B-Gone."

The latest cartoon by the most widely syndicated political cartoonist in the world has raised the ire of the Anti-Defamation League (ADL), which is dedicated to fighting anti-Semitism.

The ADL's director called the syndicated cartoon, published Wednesday and reprinted below, "hideously anti-Semitic."

"Pat Oliphant's outlandish and offensive use of the Star of David in combination with Nazi-like imagery is hideously anti-Semitic," Abraham Foxman said in a statement released Wednesday. "It employs Nazi imagery by portraying Israel as a jack-booted, goose-stepping headless apparition. The implication is of an Israeli policy without a head or a heart."

http://rawstory.com/news/2008/Oliphant_IsraelGaza_cartoon_called_hideously_antiSemitic_0325.html

The word "anti-semite" is a linguistic warfare term. What that means is that you create a word, jam-pack it full of emotional meaning, then apply it to a political opponent.

To prove that, I would ask you: Is it possible to legitimately criticize a Jew without qualifying as anti-semitic? (And by the way, what year is this, 1985? The word has been played out for years.)

I will tell you that these Orthodox nutjobs (who truly, honestly believe non-Jews to be subhuman) would believe any criticism to be anti-semitic. Jews live in a dreamworld where Esau hates Jacob because he has nothing else to do.

Jews live in a dreamworld constructed by rabbis who inculcate in them some singularly asinine beliefs, such as:

• Everyone hates Jews. Esau hates Jacob.
• Jews are the chosen people.

These beliefs are inculcated in the young for the purpose of enlisting them in the Jewish Drone Army, those who will do all that is required of them for the Hive Mind, the Jewish Nation. And should anyone point out that their behavior really isn't all that cool, it's okay to disregard the complaints of those filthy goyim because Esau hates Jacob, remember? Isn't it convenient that it's a built-in part of the religion that people just hate you for no reason?

I've been staying out of this debate about Gaza because I truly am trying to move on to other material. I don't like sounding like a broken record.

But I will tell you, what with the shooting of old women and little children in the head and the phosphorus bombs and the shit in the beds, and the use of children as human shields, Israelis are conducting themselves like pure animals.

And where the "anti-semite" advertising slogan ultimately proves short-sighted is that Jews come to believe their own marketing that if someone calls them out on bad behavior, it's only because Esau hates Jacob and that the complaint may be ignored. ...all the while the behavior racks up and the karmic debts increase.

Do not engage Jews. They are the victims of successive layers of death-based, pagan programming. They are mentally ill. They sacrifice their weak and elderly in pagan ceremonies to their egregore god and then blame it all on everyone else. They think they're better than everyone else. They flew planes into the World Trade Center.

Any Jew that you see roaming around is likely very ill and belongs in a mental hospital. If he knew the slightest bit of Jewish history --especially about the rabbis' instigation of the Shoah-- his mind would implode. He would have no identity. He would recognize himself not as a victim, but as the aggressor.

Judaism is a failed religion. It has brought nothing but misery to any who had the misfortune of experiencing it.

Judaism is an illness.

At some point I'm just going to have to apologize to my audience for my own failures.

It is nigh impossible to carry on in some comedic fashion in today's environment. It's like trying to run a day-care center in a slaughterhouse. The environs are just not [long, long, sigh] well suited to the task.

"Be funny, be funny, be funny," I say in the morning. But by the afternoon I start lazily fantasizing about being a serial killer. Like one of the guys I see in those crime novels. "What did it? What caused Chris to turn from a promising, lucrative, diamonds-and-champagne comedy career and instead just start killing people?"

I do have professional standards, you know. And I want you to know that even though I am not getting my ticket receipts --which I am severely, severely pissed off about, by the way-- I will strive to keep it upbeat and fun.

Newsflash: It's because you're not relevant.

While President Obama took great pains to call on reporters from ethnic and foreign news establishments at Tuesday's press conference, the president didn't call on a single major US newspaper.

As once mighty Grey Ladies across the country are ceasing publication or cutting their print editions entirely to publish only online, the president's decision to not call on any of the country's most respected papers raises the question of whether anyone, outside of print reporters, truly cares about the continued demise of newspapers.

http://rawstory.com/news/2008/As_newspaper_revenues_plummet_Obama_slights_0325.html

And didn't he snub you at some recent Gridiron dinner? Y'all hobnob and glad-hand each other into thinking you're part of the power structure? You're not.

What do you think happens when you leave the really big stories like, oh, say, 9-11, to the guys who have to teach themselves how to be journalists and who sometimes, yes, use the wrong words?

The nation was attacked, it was conquered, and it is now being dismembered by the bankers who commissioned 9-11. ("Huh?" Exactly. Now tell me why you are in any manner qualified to analyze modern politics? "But we can't say it was Israelis; Israelis are Jews. And if we say anything bad about Jews, that makes people think that we want to cook them right up and eat them." Exactly. Do you see the value of linguistic warfare now? Lesson learned: We should leave news to intelligence specialists, not journalists. Tears mean nothing to intelligence types.)

All this happened on your watch, during which watch you claimed to be some kind of "fourth estate" or something.

If you are an American journalist, you need to come to grips with the fact that your industry is dead. You will lose your job soon. That will be a good thing. Why? Not only do you do nothing, but you represent yourselves as doing something, which means that the news consumer takes your word for it that all is well in the world.

The American news consumer has had to rely on domestic intelligence analysts and foreign news sources for information.

Ahem:

WE HAVE TO GO OVERSEAS TO GET DECENT AMERICAN NEWS.

Please go out of business as soon as possible. You're just consuming resources.

Good morning, my Little Dream Children.

How are you all today?

I see that we've not yet reached a decision regarding my ticket receipts. Have I not contributed to your understanding of events? Have I not caused the scales to fall from your eyes? Do I not perform some useful function in your life? Why, if it were not for me, you'd probably think that cavemen possessed the magical ability to remove center columns from towers using only their minds! That way, when the planes flew right into that abortion of yours, the buildings could blow up and fall down, just like the NIST report said --the report that conveniently neglected to make any mention of the center columns, the ones that got mathematically removed from the model, the columns that held the buildings up, the columns that the terriss made disappear using only their psychic powers when they flew their Flight Termination System-equipped planes into your friends' boardroom meetings. (Imagine looking up to see that!)

You'd probably still think that it wasn't Israel that did it.

And you'd probably still think that they don't fry themselves now and again. And then moan and groan their way right over to the cash register. (It's just business. It's gotta be someone's shtick. They just drew the short straw, is all.)

See? Don't I advance the class concensus here? Don't I deserve even a morsel that I may clutch to my filthy breast and over which I may snarl in the corner? With all the finery and the top hats and the canes and the proper breeding, you'd think my audience would not permit their servants to dress in rags.

You know your society was conquered, right? (Turns out that USA is not #1; USA wasn't even in the running. It was fake, like a car commercial, like a big shiny truck bounding over rocks and then everyone meets up at the mountain lodge and wipes sweat from their brows. But it's just pretend. Like America.) A good portion of you will be starved to death, some will languish in torture chambers, and your children will be enslaved in service to Lucifer. Your future precisely resembles the inside of a Nazi concentration camp. That is not hyperbole.

Did you learn about all this over the past fifteen years while you were doing your abdominizer and texting for hookups and laughing at cocktail parties? No, I don't suppose you did.

So why don't you be quiet now and let the informed among us speak.

And why don't you make yourself useful and figure out how I can feed myself by speaking to you. Why don't you figure out how USA can be #1, how America can be the land of the free and the home of the brave, how the gutless wonders in my audience can avoid quaking in their shoes at the prospect of buying their tickets to a stand-up comedy show.

America has fallen so very far, hasn't she?

So is that something that you can do while I figure out how to explain how you might prevent being murdered and enslaved and debased as the subhuman garbage that your conquerors regard you as?

Hmm?

Dream Children?

In addition to being an Asperger's Sufferer(R), I am now a Shingles Survivor(R).

So I am doubly worthy of your forbearance. Not only are my utterances revolting, but my countenance is, now, too. My face is horribly disfigured with some revivified chicken pox virus. The oozing pustules and lesions are enough to frighten anyone away. My right eye verily seems constructed of blood and pus. I fear I shall be permanently scarred, much like my psyche already is. I have taken to effecting a hunchback pose by stuffing towels under the shoulders of my coat and lurching around.

See? I told you that I needed those new Glamour Shots. (The ones with the football or other sports object and the full erection.) Now it's too late. A once-beautiful flower, now the town hunchback, skulking from alleyway to pier.

It is spring now.

I am pleased to note,

that I have not drunk, I have not smoked, and I have not posted in three days.

Didn't I say that 2009 was going to be the year that good things happen for me?

These are youth brigades.

NPR.org, March 19, 2009 · Tens of thousands of Americans could see more opportunities to mentor children, help rebuild homes and participate in other national service under a measure passed by the House.

The House voted 321-105 Wednesday to expand AmeriCorps and other national service programs by 175,000 participants. The measure also would create new groups to help poor communities with education, clean energy, health and services for veterans.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=102113441

I don't care what you think about them now, I don't care how the idea is being sold, I am telling you that these are Nazi-style youth brigades. How do I know? I know this because bankers like youth brigades; they are an efficient means of mobilizing the fittest of the population, the segment of the population with the least invested in the status quo, those who will be most willing to overthrow it.

Should you choose to investigate the matter, you will find that the bankers who commissioned 9-11 are the very same bankers who installed Adolf Hitler as their nation's Avenging Angel. I have not yet completed my Master's thesis on the Jewish Nation, but I will tell you that communism and Nazism are the preferred Jewish business model. Don't let them fool you. They involve themselves in banking for the purpose of influencing civil authority. They always work through civil authority.

That is not a cross word. It is a diagnosis.

The young people in these corps will be snitching on you, they will be seizing your arms, and they will oversee the internment camps.

You are erecting your very own Nazi state.

What can you expect? Well, what did we see during the Nazi regime in Germany? You can expect a great deal of cleansings for the sin of rejecting the authority of the Talmud.

This man needs to be removed from office immediately.

Missouri Governor Jay Nixon has defended a report issued by the Missouri Information Analysis Center that smears Ron Paul supporters, people who have knowledge of the U.S. Constitution, and people who display political bumper stickers as potential domestic terrorists.

As we revealed in our exclusive report last week, a leaked secret report distributed by the federal Missouri Information Analysis Center lists Ron Paul supporters, libertarians, people who display bumper stickers, people who own gold, or even people who fly a U.S. flag and equates them with radical race hate groups and terrorists.

The MIAC report specifically describes supporters of presidential candidates Ron Paul, Chuck Baldwin, and Bob Barr as “militia” influenced terrorists and instructs the Missouri police to be on the lookout for supporters displaying bumper stickers and other paraphernalia associated with the Constitutional, Campaign for Liberty, and Libertarian parties.

http://www.prisonplanet.com/missouri-governor-stands-behind-miac-smear-report.html

You will recall that the document in question equates with terrorists those who advocate an adherence to the US Constitution. So, yes, it really does boil down to the nonsensical proposition that advocating following the law is against the law.

There is only one group of persons to whom following fundamental law is a threat: those who need to break fundamental law.

I don't know where this document originated. The Pentagon maybe, or the CIA or Homeland Security.

Mister Nixon has cast his lot. He works for those who are subverting the law. He himself is subverting the law.

He is way at the bottom of the food chain, but Mister Nixon works for the bankers who commissioned 9-11. They needed lawful government gone like yesterday.

Not too bright, though.

It's always a matter of faith, isn't it?

It can never be easy, can it?

I'm changing the title of this show.

I don't like how it's going already. It's too depressing. It's not where I want to be going.

I will keep the URL for the show, but I'll just re-title it. It's new name is:

He Came from a Nonstruct Region to Save the World,
Even Though No One Would Buy a Ticket or Anything.
His Secret Reserves of Energy Were Positively Otherworldly.

Why does this person even exist?

The Republican's Working Man hero Joe the Plumber could barely contain himself last night before a crowd of adoring, media-bashing conservatives.

"God, all this love and everything in the room - I'm horny," declared Joe, whose real name is Samuel Wurzelbacher.

The particular state of his libido was way too much information, certainly for the Sleuth. But she wasn't the only slack-jawed person in the room.

It seemed that all of those who were gathered in the ballroom of Washington's Grand Hyatt hotel for the Media Research Center's annual "DisHonors Awards" ceremony designed to bash the dreaded liberal elite media were stunned. Buzz immediately commenced.

"Did Joe the Plumber really just say he's horny?" "Did you hear Joe say 'horny'?" "Why is he horny and why is he telling us?"

http://voices.washingtonpost.com/sleuth/2009/03/_the_republicans_working_man.html

I'm not the type to begrudge anyone his boondoggle; good for him. But WHAT THE EFF does it take to get a gig around here?

Is that the secret? You have to make sure that you say absolutely nothing of any consequence? Do I have to wear acid-washed jeans?

Mister President,

I want you to know that I'm in your corner on this. I know how to deal with these things.

I don't have the transcript in front of me, but I understand that you may have said something a bit untoward during your taping of Leno yesterday, on the topic of your bowling a 125 at the White House bowling alley. If my producer's accounting of events is correct, you said, "and those stupid retards at Special Olympics couldn't have bowled any better. I mean, who are they? They should be eaten anyway. Get rid of 'em." And then you stood up and flapped your arms and kicked up your heels and made boopie-boopie-boop noises and made like you were all mentally retarded or something.

I want you to know that stuff comes out sometimes. It's all part of workin' a loosey-goosey style. Don't beat yourself up.

The secret to getting yourself out of that mess is to immediately commit an even greater sin. Start throwin' around racial epithets and cursing at the people at the press briefing. Say the eff-word. Pretty soon no one will recall exactly why they're angry at you and everyone just goes home confused. Begin next news cycle.

We need to discuss a few things.

First, let's recap:

I have carried on this blog-based show for four years now. At no time has anyone ever mentioned it to me. No one writes, no one emails, no one calls. When I visited Orlando and tried to gather some intelligence, no one professed to have any knowledge of it.

My audience numbers somewhere between zero and ten thousand. I can't know. No one will speak to me. No one has ever spoken to me.

I have been forced to try to divine my surroundings as if I were a blind man, feeling around in the dark to locate the perimeter and the furnishings of a room. Or, more precisely, by echolocation: like the blind man tossing pebbles in various directions to hear where they strike within that room. And if he hears someone say "ouch," he knows that someone is there.

I have only been able to infer the size and composition of my audience. I have no conclusive proof.

In one of my earlier incarnations, after I wanted to be a constitutional scholar but before I wanted to be a stand-up comedian, I thought I might like to be an electronics engineer: the guy who designs your Ipod or your microwave oven.

Toward that end, I took some digital design classes. In these classes, one learns how to take all the various integrated circuits --or "chips," as the layman calls them-- and make an Ipod or a TV. You thumb through the catalog of all the ICs from the various manufacturers, find one that does what you need, look at the specs for the IC, and then design your circuit to accommodate it.

Let's say that we're using TTL circuits --"transistor to transistor" logic levels, operating at zero and five volts. A logic zero is represented by zero volts, and a logic one is represented by five volts. This is how chips talk to one another, by voltages communicated along those thin wire leads on a circuit board. Everything within a digital device like an Ipod is represented by a zero or a one.

In practice, these TTL circuits will tolerate some messiness in what constitutes a zero or a one; a zero can be anything from zero volts to, say, 1.2 volts, and a one can be anything from five volts down to 3.8 volts. You will know the tolerance of the IC by looking at the specs in the catalog.

As the zero or the one "moves" along the wire traces on the circuit board, those voltage levels may change due to any number of considerations: resistance along the wire, or maybe a voltage could be induced in the lead by some nearby component on the circuit board --a transformer, say.

The engineer has to be aware of these things and he must design his circuit properly. If he is remiss, his circuit will cause the zeroes and ones to take on voltage levels that fall outside the permissible range, from zero volts up to 1.2 volts for a zero, and from five volts down to 3.8 volts for a one. Anything that falls within this unacceptable range of 1.2 to 3.8 volts is said to be in the "zone of uncertainty."

If a chip receives a communication from another chip where ones or zeroes fall within this uncertainty zone, that chip will not know what to do with it. But it will do something with it; it will randomly interpret it as a one or a zero. There's no telling. When electronic devices make mistakes, it's generally not because of component failure; it's because the engineer has permitted uncertainty zones within his circuit. Cheap electronics at Best Buy are cheap for a reason; the manufacturer is trying to fob some poorly designed device off at whatever price it will fetch.

For the past four years, I have been performing exclusively inside a zone of uncertainty. One day I'm convinced that I have an audience, and the next day my friends are helpfully reassuring me that I'm just crazy. It is not reasonable, after all, to believe that people on TV are talking to you. And for every inferred data point that would seem to buttress my belief that I have an audience, there is another to weigh against it; "Ah! There's an echo! Proof!" But then on the street, no one will talk to me, I can't get arrested, I can't get killed, and I'm a complete non-person. It's like I don't exist. No one over the past four years has ever even acknowledged my existence.

It is extremely emotionally disturbing to me to exist inside a zone of uncertainty because I CANNOT KNOW HOW TO PROCEED. I cannot know how to interpret the information. My interpretation of that information will be wrong as often as it is right.

So if ever I have disappointed my audience, it is because I am denied valid information. I can't know what you want. Whose fault is that? I exist to perform my function. I exist to please people. But I don't read minds.

Living inside an uncertainty zone is bothersome to me because then my mind starts to conjure its own reality, like the mind of the man in a sensory-deprivation tank. I exist inside a solitary-confinement cell. I am going crazy by lack of communion with other humans.

I have begged for something as simple as a phone call or a cheap paper note that I can put on the nightstand that says "Someone is here." And no one will do this.

I don't understand why. If you people think it's funny, it's not. I don't know what your game is, but I don't care for it. It is bothersome to me and it is affecting my emotional and physical health. I will tell you that I have been pedal-to-the-metal for five years now and I am very tired. My "health meter" is flashing red. I need to do something different in order to recharge my batteries. I will not permit my batteries to completely discharge.

I will remove myself from this zone of uncertainty one way or another. Either I will stop this asinine undertaking and get on with my life or you will start buying your tickets so that I can put on a proper show. If you do not buy your tickets, I will stop. My health depends on it. But it would be the tragedy of the century for me to stop if, indeed, it turns out that I had an audience after all and that success was within my grasp. I do not want to have wasted five years, but then I do not want to continue if no one is watching.

This show is not free. This is not some blog about my Furby collection or how I had such a rad time at the mall with my friends. This is the professional undertaking of a professional comedian. That it may be delivered by way of the internet in no way implies that it is free. If you are reading this, that means that you have entered my theater, you have taken a seat, and you are partaking of my services. You are obligated to buy your ticket. That ticket is one hundred dollars per person, per year.

If you are reading this, you are obligated to compensate the performer for his efforts. NO ONE GETS A FREE TICKET. Are you in the news media? You still have to buy your ticket. This is not "news." This is a stand-up comedy show. Are you in the Justice Department, investigating me? That's nice; I planned it that way. It's called "assembling an audience." It's what you do when you put on a show. That you were conned into entering my theater is part of the show. You still are obligated to buy your ticket.

THERE ARE NO COMP PASSES TO THIS SHOW. If you think you are entitled to a comp pass, you are not. I do not give out comp passes, except in the instance where an approved person is there to review the show. I have not delivered a comp pass to anyone who may review the show.

EACH AND EVERY LAST PERSON READING THIS, FOR WHATEVER REASON HE MAY BE HERE, WHETHER HE BE FOREIGN OR DOMESTIC, IS OBLIGATED TO BUY HIS TICKET.

You don't get too many chances in life. I'm on my last chance. I'm forty-one and I have failed at every last thing I ever attempted. ...except maybe for this. If this doesn't work out, there's nothing left. That's it.

Despite the helpful assurances of my friends, I trust my echolocation. I am not crazy. I know full well that you people are there. YOU ARE OBLIGATED TO BUY YOUR TICKET, EACH AND EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU. You are seated in a physical theater, watching me walk around on a wooden stage. There is an usher coming around with a brass plate, into which YOU WILL place your hundred dollars. Got that? And if you have been here for two years, then you owe me $120. (Last year's price was twenty dollars.)

And you are paying for services already rendered. You pay when you enter the theater, but you get no refunds should I ever decide to stop for whatever reason. (I expect to be doing this for some time, so you have no concerns about being stiffed. But I want no logistical worries should I ever need or want to stop.)

I need those ticket receipts for a few reasons: I need to pay my bills, I need to remove myself from that emotionally disturbing zone of uncertainty, and I need to finance a video-based show. I am not asking for anything that isn't already mine. I am perfectly capable of having my comedy career outside normal channels. As a matter of fact, the comedy I do cannot occur within normal channels. It can't be advertiser-supported. It can only occur by ticket sales.

I can discern only one reason why people are not buying their tickets: the Government Man has wet his pants. I don't care. What the Government Man thinks is of zero consequence to me. I didn't fly planes into the World Trade Center. I didn't mail any anthrax. I didn't rape any little girls and boys in some hellhole gulag.

The Government Man did.

What the Government Man thinks means nothing to me. I completely ignore him.

If you are the Government Man, I want you to have a little sense of shame and at least recognize that it is not I who has acted unlawfully here. I want you to have the shame sufficient to remove me from your various lists. I need my audience to feel comfortable buying their tickets.

I have the jester's license. The jester has permission to speak as he may because he is the least among us. And should one of his betters take issue with his speech, then that means that one of his betters can't handle it. That is the essence of the license. Should one object to the license, he is perfectly welcome to leave the theater. This isn't a concentration camp. One is free to leave at any time.

We may logically propose that if the jester has a license to speak, then he has a license to earn a living so that he might speak. He has a license to feed himself.

Should one object to the jester's feeding himself, then one necessarily objects to the license itself. ...in which case he is obligated to leave the theater.

If one remains in my theater, he obviously respects my license to speak. If he respects my license to speak, he must then respect my license to eat.

If you, Government Man, remain in my theater, then you implicitly agree that I may feed myself. You will not stand in the way of my audience buying their tickets. Do you understand me?

You have only two choices: Leave the theater, or permit the purchasing of tickets. There are no other options.

Now, I understand that people may feel uncomfortable sending money to some guy who is saying things that could land him --and any financial associates-- in some foreign hellhole gulag. (I'm sorry that the Government Man reserves that right to himself. Again, none of my doing.)

So let's structure this in some way that is acceptable to all parties. Let's make this as legit as possible.

I propose working through an agent. I propose that this agent confer with the Government Man in devising some legally acceptable system. And I propose that I be represented by legal counsel.

I would like my agent to be Jon Stewart. I get him already. And I think he gets me. I'm completely down with his sense of humor. And when I rolled out my cucka joke wagon I kept an eye on how he did things on his side of the street and I modeled myself after him; I studied how he slathered his essence on a bun and sold it to whatever unsuspecting customer may happen by. And hopefully he can forgive my admittedly intemperate remarks about, you know, his being a little bitch for blocking my TV show and how I'm the best and all. (You know how I am, and there's always bitching among comedians anyway. I regard it as nothing but some inherent messiness among comedians who are, almost by definition, screwed up in the head to begin with. It's amazing that we function as well as we do.)

So should you choose to accept the position, Mister Stewart, I would be honored to have you as my agent. Take whatever cut you feel is appropriate. Should the Borg Collective start causing you problems and you wish to decline, I understand perfectly. In that case, I would ask that you select an agent for me.

I would propose that my legal counsel be Patrick Leahy. Guess what, Leahy, you're working pro bono. I ask that you provide any assistance in talks between my agent and the Government Man.

Mister Obama, I would ask that you remove me from your various lists. Again, if you assent to my possession of the jester's license, then you assent to my license to feed myself. (And, further, if you assent to my possession of the license, then you assent to my having a personal life while I exercise that license. No harm may come to any business or personal associate.)

I really have very little interest in playing to the unwashed masses. I am quite content with the audience that I have, which I regard as the finest one could ask for. So I propose some kind of website that is password-protected, where the content is available only to my present audience, which is comprised of people in the fields of news, entertainment, government, and military. I'm perfectly happy with that.

So my agent confers with the Government Man and receives assurances that no legal harm will come to any who buy tickets from my authorized agent. My agent opens a bank account for the purpose and sends me a yearly check with my ticket receipts. I finance my video show. Problem solved.

So what say you all?

I need a check delivered as soon as possible. Spring is almost here and I want to recharge my batteries and get started on my show. Please send any communications or monies by UPS or FedEx to my home address at 10 Rockingham Post Road, Rockingham, Vermont 05101. My agent may call me at 802-463-2032.

Thank you.

Cuba is a veritable beacon of lawfulness and decency compared to the United States.

Why the embargo? We should be emulating our neighbor to the south.

This nation is dead, its people are vile, disgusting, degenerate zombies, and America is in no way Number One in anything.

The United States is a rotted corpse just waiting to fall over.

The most asinine thing I ever catalogued here in 3-space was this utterance from some dumbass at the gas station two years ago:

"The terrorists hate us because we're number one."

He just blurted it out as he was eating a sandwich, uttered apropos of nothing at all, as if his little brain were trying to make sense of all the inconsistencies in the narrative that got sold like Axxe Body Spray by the TV Man. His atrophied pinhead brain seized upon it as the only plausible explanation for why cavemen would attack a military superpower.

I assume that even our sandwich-eating, dullard friend has come to realize that his abortion of a country no longer exists, much less is it Number One.

I sometimes feel embarrassment at being perceived as crazy. An acquaintance of mine (not friend) calls me "the least-normal person I have ever known." But then I remind myself that I am ORDERS OF MAGNITUDE more rational than 99% of the people in this country. If that's crazy, I'll take it.

There is nothing more satisfying in all the world than to watch the "sane" of society starve to death while the "crazy" among us get to gorge ourselves on our food stores and then inseminate their widows. The "crazy" of the world will spread their DNA far and wide.

"And the crazy shall inherit the earth."

Do you see what the lack of moral authority results in?

You look like a joke.

US urges Cuba to free prisoners 'immediately'

The United States on Wednesday urged Cuba to free political prisoners immediately and to improve human rights on the communist-ruled island.

http://rawstory.com/news/afp/US_urges_Cuba_to_free_prisoners_imm_03182009.html

Tend to your own human-rights abuses, you Orcs.

(I bet they don't make their prisoners jerk off.)

Degenerate pigs.

Nigger.

Oh, sure, sometimes I wonder if I'm going too far with the whole 'nigger' thing. But I don't mind. You do, after all, work for the very bankers who commissioned 9-11. You deserve nothing better. You're carrying on some kind of stage show. Sing and dance for your audience, nigger.

Prosecute those animals who ruined this nation's reputation. Fulfill your treaty obligations. The Red Cross --the arbiters of what does and does not constitute torture, and whose determination this nation is legally obligated to respect-- has judged that your savages committed torture.

Try and execute every last one of those animals. Give us our human sacrifice.

...before we take our own...

I was reminded last week that New York is a dead city.

I could smell your friends' stink.

All hail Rabbi Schneerson and the Hive Mind.

Things are free, right?

DENVER (AP) — With backing from three entrepreneurs, staffers of the recently shuttered Rocky Mountain News plan to start an online news publication if they can get 50,000 paying subscribers by April 23 — what would have been the News' 150th anniversary.

The local venture, InDenverTimes.com, would go live on May 4 if backers meet their subscription goal.

The site would offer some news free, with advertising revenue footing part of the bill. Readers who buy subscriptions starting at $4.99 a month for a year's commitment would get extra features, including columns, interactive features, feeds to mobile devices and customizable content.

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5jUKFN5dgQ9zftjAOZ8ajWiedUkPgD96VC4080

Now add this one:

Thank you for your subscription pledge of 12 months - $59.88
($4.99/month).

We Look forward to bringing you the vision based on a 150 year tradition, beginning May 4, 2009.

IN DENVER TIMES

(An email I received.)

Do you know why I got this email? It's because I pledged to buy a subscription. (I will be charged when and if they can cobble together enough pledgers to make it a going concern.)

See? Not everyone's a loser who thinks that things are free. I fully expect to spend several hundred dollars per year --approaching a thousand dollars-- for quality intelligence.

Let's hope that their audience comes to believe that things are not free.

Note to INDenverTimes: Drop the he said/she said garbage. Give me intelligence. I have zero interest in someone's balanced counterpoint to intelligence. I want facts and analysis.

Nigger.

Prosecute these animals.

US interrogators attached detainees to collars like dogs and used their leashes to slam them against walls, forced them to stand for days wearing only diapers, and tied detainees necks with towels and threw them against plywood walls, according to accounts in a secret 2007 report issued by the Red Cross to be printed in a New York magazine and leaked on Monday.

The report -- issued by the International Committee of the Red Cross and kept secret for the last two years -- is the first first-hand document to legally say the Bush Administration's harsh interrogation techniques "constituted torture." They strongly imply that CIA interrogators violated international law.

http://rawstory.com/news/2008/Its_official_Red_Cross_report_says_0316.html

P.S. Why would you deserve to be addressed as anything other than nigger? You have done nothing but lie to me and steal from me. Struttin' around, holding your pants up with one hand, lookin' for whatever isn't nailed down that you can steal.

So that's your new name. Nigger. You don't even warrant the extra breath spent on a "mister" or even a "hey."

If I want to talk to you, I'll just look at you and say nigger.

"You're a liar. You said that you loved me."

I do love you. And in some other arm of the galaxy, at some point in the future, I'd buy you a drink. You seem like a nice guy. But here, don't you ever come to believe that we're friends. The comedian has no friends and he has no enemies.

We are not friends. Not to mention that I will not be seen associating with those who run interference for torturers. If those men were under my command, they'd be tried and executed by now.

Essentially, your standards of behavior do not meet mine. I would have fulfilled my moral and legal obligations already.

You want to move on up to tha Eas' Side? Then act like you belong there.

My Own Reality

Comfortably Numb

I have generally not considered this central to what I am doing.

But I find it fascinating.

Mister Obama, what passport did you possess when you traveled to Pakistan in 1981?

And what would your possession of that passport mean?

And what would that mean?

It's a wondrous world we live in, isn't it?

Wow. It sure would be nice if Antiwar.com would give attribution when stealing material.

The State of Missouri Information Analysis Center recently issued a no-longer-secret report on domestic terrorism.

The Feb. 20 report called “The Modern Militia Movement” specifically identifies people who “display Campaign for Liberty, Constitution Party, or Libertarian material. These members are usually supporters of former Presidential candidate: Ron Paul, Chuck Baldwin, and Bob Barr.”

The report identifies red flags that can identify potential domestic terrorists:

* Bumper stickers for third-party candiates like Ron Paul
* Talk of “New World Order” conspiracy theories
* Opposition to the Federal Reserve and support of the gold standard
* Opposition to US Army takeover of Homeland Security
* Opposition to the North American Union
* Opposition to universal military service
* Tax resistance
* Possession of subversive literature: “pictures, cartoons, bumper stickers that contain anti-government rhetoric. Most of this material will depict the FRS, IRS, FBI, ATF, CIA, UN, Law Enforcement, and ‘New World Order’ in a derogatory manner.”

One of the examples shown is the Gadsden Flag (”Don’t Tread on Me”).

http://www.antiwar.com/blog/2009/03/15/if-you-are-reading-this-you-may-already-be-a-terrorist/

That story was broken by Alex Jones, to whom the report was mailed by some insider. Neither the AP nor Antiwar would have known about it were it not for the efforts of the journalists at Prisonplanet.

The Son of God v. the Avenging Angel

"Chris, why is your brain turned to mush now?"

"Why so matter-of-fact about everything? Why all the heavy drinking? Why do you rattle around the house and laugh and talk to yourself? Sheesh, it's like your brain has been turned to mush from being in a heightened state of fight-or-flight for five years. Oh, now I know why you deserve your ticket receipts: with legitimacy comes safety. You'd be a professional social commentator! Now I get it! And now I know why you think that every last journalist should be walking the bread line: Because if they don't live each and every day in fear of their very lives, then they're obviously not doing what is known in the industry as 'news!' I'm so glad that you've been doing everyone's job for five years and that your brain is shot because of it. Keep up the good work. We appreciate foresighted individuals like you. Now enjoy your Slim Jim wrapper at supper tonight."

Revelations that a political assassination unit which reported solely to Dick Cheney was in operation during the Bush administration are absent the fact that the unit in question, the Joint Special Operations Command, has been active for decades, has been deployed domestically in the U.S., has killed U.S. citizens, and is an integral part of Barack Obama’s expanded wars in Afghanistan and Pakistan.

Seymour Hersh dropped a bombshell when he told a University of Minnesota audience on Tuesday that the Joint Special Operations Command is, “An executive assassination ring essentially, and it’s been going on and on and on,” Hersh stated. “Under President Bush’s authority, they’ve been going into countries, not talking to the ambassador or the CIA station chief, and finding people on a list and executing them and leaving. That’s been going on, in the name of all of us.”

...

As we learn from the Global Security website, the Joint Special Operations Command in fact comprises mostly of Delta Force soldiers and SEALs. The unit was established in 1980 and is located at Pope Air Force Base, North Carolina and at nearby Fort Bragg.

The assassination unit was not a creation of the Bush administration or Dick Cheney, it has in fact been “involved in a number of covert military operations over the last two decades,” including the covert U.S. invasions of Panama and Granada, as well as search and rescue missions in Somalia, and searching for alleged war criminals in Yugoslavia.

...

It was also reported that Delta Force were involved in the largest ever single act of slaughter of civilians by law enforcement in US history - the 1993 siege on the Branch Davidian compound at Waco.

...

According to Global Security, Bill Clinton’s 1994 Presidential Decision Directive 25 “exempt(s) the Joint Special Operations Command from the Posse Comitatus Act of 1878 18USC Sec.1385, PL86-70, Sec. 17[d]. which makes it illegal for military and law enforcement to exercise jointly.”

The Joint Special Operations Command is a sub-unit of the United States Special Operations Command, which is described at the “Department of Defense’s front man in the global war on terrorism”. A New York Times article from last year reported that the Joint Special Operations Command were conducting ground raids in Pakistan supposedly aimed at hunting “Al-Qaeda members”. Such raids have only increased since Obama came to power.

Once again, the corporate media has completely fudged the most prescient issue arising out of Hersh’s revelation, which is the fact that the Joint Special Operations Command (mainly comprising of Delta Force) was not merely the brainchild or personal political assassination wing for Dick Cheney, but it has been in operation for decades, including inside the United States, has been involved in the murder of U.S. citizens, and is an integral part of Barack Obama’s expansion of the so-called war on terror.

http://www.prisonplanet.com/cheney-assassination-unit-still-active-under-obama-including-domestically.html

Don't you have better things to do?

US President Barack Obama, citing an existing health "hazard," announced Saturday the creation of a special interagency panel on food safety, arguing that the status quo was "unacceptable."

He also appointed Margaret Hamburg, an expert in bioterrorism, to lead the Food and Drug Administration, the agency in charge of securing the nation's food supply.

The Food Safety Working Group, chaired by the secretaries of health and human services and agriculture, will coordinate US government activities aimed upgrading and enforcing food safety laws, the White House said.

"I expect this group to report back to me with recommendations as soon as possible," Obvama said in his weekly radio address. "In the end, food safety is something I take seriously, not just as your president, but as a parent."

http://rawstory.com/news/2008/Obama_Food_safety_provisions_unacceptable_0314.html

My rights are my property. Barack Obama has busied himself with nothing else over his short term in office but stealing my property.

And I've seen that proposed list of banned weapons, as well as Holder's legal rationale for it: That if a weapon has ever been used by the military or law enforcement, that such weapon was selected for its military usefulness and is, by definition, not a sporting gun. And since sporting guns are what is covered by the Second Amendment, then the people have no right to bear those military weapons.

The problem here is one assumption that Holder slipped into his argument: that the Second Amendment is to secure one's right to shoot clay pigeons.

That's not what it's there for. It is there so that fundamental law can be enforced. It is there so that the people may defend a lawful, republican form of government. It is there so that the populace --to whose benefit the government ostensibly operates-- may kneel people like Barack Obama and Eric Holder down on the ground and blow their fuckin' heads off.

Do you understand that, slave? The architects of this republican government had some experience with tyranny. (Something that you and your buddy Holder would be assumed to have some cultural knowledge of. The first gun-control statutes in this land were enacted after the Reconstruction, as a means of denying freed slaves the ability to defend themselves when the lynch mobs came a-callin'.)

The right to bear arms isn't about hunting squirrels. It's about hunting criminals. ...criminals just like you.

The Second Amendment is about ensuring that the people may never be disarmed of the weapons necessary to wash the streets in the blood of government agents. A cursory study of the "legislative history" of the Constitution would make that abundantly clear.

The Second Amendment is about killing you, Obama. It's so that should you start getting uppity and presuming to dictate the menu instead of working the kitchen --which is where the president belongs-- the people may track you down, string you up with your hands behind your back, and cut your dick off.

Is that clear enough for you, boy? Freedom trickles down slowly, but the fact remains that if it were not for the blessings of liberty won by ornery white men, you'd be toiling in a field with a chain around your neck.

Slavery is the natural state of mankind. Don't forget that. But once people like you have got your freedom, it just burns a hole in your pocket, doesn't it? You can't wait to give it away. Well, some of us know the value of liberty. And we don't want it stolen by people like you, to be sold to the highest bidder.

Killing government agents is a time-honored American tradition. It's cool. (Especially now, what with all the lawlessness goin' on. Killing people like you plays well.)

You can't even arrest the 9-11 perpetrators who infest Washington and New York. You claim the power to spirit people off to nowhere, never to be heard from again. And now you're going to sell me on the idea of controlling the food supply? ...First it's physical security, then it's the food supply. Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs...

Pray tell, Mister Obama, what are you up to? What control system might you be installing, all because you are so very, very concerned about the safety of my food?

Get your filthy hands out of my cupboard and get back in the stable, where you belong.

You are a mere president. Your job is to service my base needs --and then to return to whatever filthy hovel you came from.

I don't know what "progressive" ideas you came to embrace during your overlong stay in school. But if you're like most of the people whose brains were somehow able to tolerate that stultifying experience, you fancy yourself pretty smart.

Well, "progress" yourself right back into the fuckin' kitchen.

My liberty is my property. It's not some car stereo for you to steal that you can later fence at whatever pawn shop will pay the most for it.

Know your place, little man.

You people can't lose your jobs fast enough to suit me.

The 20,000 journalism jobs lost in the past 18 months are flushing knowledge and experience out of American newsrooms, diminishing our lives and our democracy. The brain drain is exacting penalties that society may live to regret.

...

Veteran journalists are being pushed aside for beginning reporters without watchdog experience.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/russell-wild-and-margaret-engel/the-demise-of-investigati_b_174438.html

Watchdog. That's rich.

What's next, nigger, stealing hubcaps?

Last September, the Bush administration defended the unusual secrecy over an anti-counterfeiting treaty being negotiated by the U.S. government, which some liberal groups worry could criminalize some peer-to-peer file sharing that infringes copyrights.

Now President Obama's White House has tightened the cloak of government secrecy still further, saying in a letter this week that a discussion draft of the Anti-Counterfeiting Trade Agreement and related materials are "classified in the interest of national security pursuant to Executive Order 12958."

http://news.cnet.com/8301-13578_3-10195547-38.html?part=rss&subj=news&tag=2547-1_3-0-5

Good little nigger boy. Serve your masters, nigger.

"OOoooh! Yassa! I's gets right on dat, massa! You wants yo's secret treateh? I's gets it fo' yuh!"

"Miss Preston, get me the Nigger in Chief, would you?"

"Yes, Mister King, right away, sir. ...I have the Nigger in Chief on the line, Mister King."

I want you and your skeeve pervs out of my emails. I have not dated anyone since 1999. Listen up, nigger: YOU WILL STAY OUT OF MY PERSONAL LIFE. Got that, nigger? Don't fuck this up for me.

REMOVE ME FROM YOUR NIGGER PERV SKEEVE LISTS LIKE RIGHT NOW, NIGGER. Hop to, you little step-n-fetchit.

Where's that nigger?

Hey, nigger: Get me off whatever nigger watch list I'm on. I need my audience to feel free to buy their tickets.

I have the jester's license, which means that I have license to speak. That means that I have license to eat so that I might live to speak. Not only are you required to sit your nigger ass in your seat, but you are required to allow my audience to buy their tickets.

Take me off your various nigger lists.

Audience: You are obligated to buy your ticket. Send one hundred dollars per person to me by UPS or FedEx to my house at:

10 Rockingham Post Rd
Rockingham, VT 05101

If you gutless wonders won't give me a job in TV, then you will at least buy your ticket.

I have no other means of supporting myself. You WILL buy your ticket.

You know the country is doomed when--

advocating an adherence to the law is against the law.

Alex Jones has received a secret report distributed by the Missouri Information Analysis Center (MIAC) entitled “The Modern Militia Movement” and dated February 20, 2009. A footer on the document indicates it is “unclassified” but “law enforcement sensitive,” in other words not for public consumption. A copy of the report was sent to Jones by an anonymous Missouri police

...

The MIAC report specifically describes supporters of presidential candidates Ron Paul, Chuck Baldwin, and Bob Barr as “militia” influenced terrorists and instructs the Missouri police to be on the lookout for supporters displaying bumper stickers and other paraphernalia associated with the Constitutional, Campaign for Liberty, and Libertarian parties.

...

The MIAC report is similar to one created by the Phoenix Federal Bureau of Investigation and the Joint Terrorism Task Force during the Clinton administration (see page one and page two of the document). The FBI document explicitly designates “defenders” of the Constitution as “right-wing extremists.” The MIAC report expands significantly on the earlier document.

http://www.prisonplanet.com/secret-state-police-report-ron-paul-bob-barr-chuck-baldwin-libertarians-are-terrorists.html

Hey, nigger.

You know your laws don't touch me, right? Niggers don't have jurisdiction over white people.

How did you ever make it through law school? It's no wonder you don't understand it very well: Niggers can't read.

And if George Bush could sit there and take his medicine,

then you can take yours, nigger.

Stay in your seat, you filthy nigger. I've got the jester's license.

"Ooooh! I can'ts do nothin' about it! He gots da jestah's licenss!"

Barack Obama is the Nigger in Chief.

He's in the country club because his masters need someone to clean the place. When they want something done, they say, "Here! Nigger in Chief! Go whip those slaves for us!"

And he sweeps an arc with his arm and he nods his understanding and carries out his assigned duty.

I suspect he would also make a fine informant in a concentration camp.

Give us a toothy smile, nigger.

See,

there was a lot of hand-wringing after the election about how comedians would ridicule Barack Obama without seeming to come off as racist.

The obvious solution, then, is simply to be as racist as possible in your approach. That's the hook. He's a slave, with big fat red lips and big white teeth and he's eating watermelon all the time. And he wears rags and he obsequiously attends --although he wouldn't know such a big word, them's for white people-- he obsequiously attends to his masters' needs.

I just thought up a new joke.

What's the difference between Barack Obama and a nigger?

Answer: Niggers don't sell out their own kind. They're not frauds. They're the real deal.

In short, niggers have more class.

On your knees, boy.

Suckle on your master's life-giving organ. Coax it of its earthly riches.

Now clean yourself up. ...because I certainly don't have the custodial staff.

Barack Obama is serving his masters well.

And why wouldn't he? He is a natural-born slave. He cannot conceptualize life off his knees.

Serve, slave.

The Obama Deception

The Christ Entity resides inside the time domain.

So does the Dark One.

Men's "minds" reside there, too. Those mindslices are accessed in this physical realm by way of the three-dimensional matrix of dipoles called the brain. Your memories and your "soul" do not exist inside the brain. Your brain "tunes" information which resides inside the time domain. Your body can be commanded by entities residing inside the time domain.

The dipoles which comprise the brain transduce time domain energy and act as the link between "here" and "there."

You, your consciousness, and your soul do not exist here. Your sensory organs exist here. Your mind exists there.

There is "information leakage" between one human and another inside the time domain. This accounts for linkages between humans as a whole --as part of, say, the collective unconscious-- and between certain humans.

But all those mindslices are just part of the larger mind, the one, true human entity residing there. I suspect that this mind was attacked by a foreign species and has been fragmented as part of a divide-and-conquer strategy.

I suspect that this mind calls itself SUPERMIND.

Torture is not compatible with Christianity.

"Because my attitude is that if we capture an enemy combatant in the battlefield -- or we can use Osama bin Laden -- who may have information about a pending attack. You know what, I don't have any problem taking his head sticking it underwater and scaring the living daylights out of him and making him think we're drowning him," declared Hannity, "and I'm a Christian."

http://rawstory.com/news/2008/Hannity_suggests_Christianity_compatible_with_torture_0311.html

I will remind you that Jesus was tortured to death --at the behest of Pharisees (Orthodox rabbis.) They wanted him dead because he was a repository of the Christ spirit. They knew full well who Jesus was. They knew that the Christ Entity represented their destruction.

I highly doubt that Christ would be a big fan of torture. "Whatever you do unto the least of them, you do unto me."

The Christ Entity resides inside everyone, like a mustard seed, waiting to grow.

And the Dark One resides inside everyone, waiting to grow.

The battle is for men's souls, a battle for control of the ape-actors in this realm.

I will tell you that Sean Hannity has demons writhing in his soul. I can see them. He has been overtaken by a lust for what the Dark One has to offer, which is earthly riches. Sean Hannity is no longer in possession of his soul. He is an evil, evil man, and Christ would not recognize the Christianity he professes to embrace.

Show Title

The full title of this show is:

"Your Society Is Doomed: A Feel-Good Meditation Upon the End of America, by Christopher King"